wHy dOnt yOU LoVe Me?

Are we doing enough to satisfy our partners?

Are we providing enough of a balance that allows both parties to have a sense of satisfaction and fulfilment?

Relationships can have their ups and downs and battles we face as couples can leave us struggling to find a solution, but what helps is people trying to understand the needs and wants of their partners.

If you apply a selflessness culture to your relationship is can provide the foundation to help any challenges you will face as a couple. 

In this day and age, society has made people more selfish and more about their own needs.

This creates an environment that doesn't allow individuals to be as caring or even vulnerable as we once were. The independent culture oozing from society now also delivers people to lack trust in another person entirely. I'm not saying you should wholeheartedly trust someone but what's the point of being in a relationship if you don't trust that person in helping assist you in a positive direction in life?

If you are with someone and they don't try to learn you, then you have to question what that person wants from you. 

Is the relationship based on status?

Are you or is the person you are in a relationship with you purely with you for self-gain?

If the person you are with isn't showing you any sign they understand you as a person but will use the connects you have personally to advance in their lives, then you're benefitting the person until you are no longer useful.

Patterns that show you that a person genuinely wants to learn you are when they do things for you that you would usually do for yourself. The details that are used show you how much a person is paying attention. If a person does things for you because they want to, not because they have been asked to, that shows you how much attention that person is giving you.  If you have to ask your partner to care for you in the way you like to be cared for, then they don't value your comforts. 

While we may have comforts that are a necessity in protecting our identity, we also want to make sure that we care enough for our partners to help heal them from the traumas they grew in. That the way they are is accepted and valued, and whatever negativity that affected their lives doesn't define them. The willingness to be open and vulnerable needs to be reciprocated, allowing for both sides to show that they are flawed and that both sides are willing to help nurture, learn and evolve from one another. Once we allow for this vulnerability to be expressed, it allows for partners to be able to see the authenticity in the relationship. It allows for the details in a partners personality to be cherished and respected. That brings couples a sense of peace. This person is my person. 

A person's main desire in a relationship is wanting a partner who is the image of themselves.

 For that goal to be achieved, couples have to mimic the mentality of their partner. This starts from mimicking a partner's mannerisms to a couple fulfilling needs purely on placing their needs before their partners. If you don't have this kind of mentality in your relationship, then ask your self the following questions.

What do you want from the relationship? 

Is what you're getting fulfilling you enough?

Are you content with the life your sharing?

Do you trust this person with your happiness?

As some of my readers are going back into lockdown, take the time to learn your partner. Take the time to allow yourself to be vulnerable with your partner. Express your fears, your concerns and your ambitions. 

Allow yourself to learn your partner while your partner understands you, and with that, you have the base to flourish and blossom in your relationship.